Wait, you were expecting what!? Eeew! Ick! You bunch of perverts! The title is a SEMAPHORE!

I said it was a SEMA...

...

I- I knew that! It was a joke!

Anyway, all the pervs out there - I did so know that, stop snickering! - distracted me! As I was about to say, here's the place to find out about all the wicked little secrets of Evil Zone! Erel's going to guide you to the dark, illicit world of video game secrets and stuff! Oooooh, mysterious! What will we find out?

Well, here goes Erel!

Well, there isn't a guide to playing the game here, because, like, that's what GameFAQs is for. But if you wanna quick guide to all the goodies in the game and what the so-called FAQs won't tell you, this is the place! Did you know about the super attacks that aren't super attacks, or how to get ME to tell you who's going to be in the sequel? It's all here!

Erel doesn't like crappy localisers! Although it's better than having no localisation at all, right? But maybe you didn't know about all the changes that were made when Eretzvaju was translated into English! If so, you'd better check this out! Erel isn't happy with it, I'll tell you that. Do you know they took away my very own personal theme music!? Do you know they made me put pants on? Did you know Gally's TV show was called "Klutzy Rogue"!? Ha ha ha! Just between you and me, I wish they'd kept that name... it'd be the most entertaining part of his dumb story mode! That jerk is definitely not coming back for the sequel!

That's not talking about how Iha is a big wanted criminal, or how I want Al to do all sorts of wicked... naughty things... to my nubile... fresh...

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Eeek! Impure thoughts! Where was I? Oh, right! This might be the biggest Evil Zone page on the Net, but it's not perfect yet! There's stuff the webmaster still wants, and maybe you can help! Find out what that could be here!

I am totally coming back for the sequel.